Smallville....It hurts so good!

[sinanju]

Smallville really earned it's household nickname (Stupidville) tonight.

So Lex gets shot. In the head. Right between and just above the eyes. Also in Detroit.

He falls down in the rain. Uh oh! Could it be? Could Lex really be dead!? OH NOES!

No, of course not. When next we see him, Lex is in a hospital medical center. IN SMALLVILLE.

"Thank god we were able to med-evac him from Detroit!" sayeth Papa Luthor. Yeah. 'Cause, you know, when every moment counts and your brain has a bullet in it and is probably bleeding and/or swelling and/or dying...you don't want a big city hospital, in the very same city where you were shot.

Oh no. You want a medical center in a small to middling town in ANOTHER STATE. That's good thinking, Papa Luthor. (Well, actually, maybe it was. Detroit doesn't have meteor freaks in 31 flavors, including Chloe, who can heal the dying and bring the dead back to life. Of course he didn't know that at the time, but this being Smallville, I guess the odds were pretty good.)

But alas! Chloe and Clark realize Luthor was with Kara and Lois when somebody popped a cap in his head. Where are they now!? They could be In Danger (tm). "It's Thursday. Lois/Lana must be in mortal peril again...." ON NOES REDUX! The answer is in Lex's coma-fied head!

Fortunately, LexCorp has an insanely dangerous experimental mind-reading machine. Yes, really. It's killed three would-be interrogators, but they don't have Kryptonian machismo. So Clark straps himself into the machine and goes spelunking in Lex's subconscious. Which is to say this whole melodramatic plot is an excuse for Clark to wade through Lex's brain and Learn Valuable Lessons.

Lessons like:

• Evil Lex wears an all-white suit and can match Clark punch for punch and then some.
• Good Lex is a chubby child hiding in the musty corridors of Lex's brain, where he plays a deadly game of cat and mouse with Evil Lex, who will (of course) throttle the life from Good Lex if he ever catches him.
• Evil Lex likes to make Clark watch while memories of Lex and Lana having sex play out in front of Clark in glorious full color and sound.
• Good Lex has memories too, of being abused by his evil parents. There's a shocker.

Eventually Clark gets the info he needs, but not before Chloe sucks the life from pumps life back into Lex, who is dying from the effects of the machine. Then she falls over and dies for eighteen hours. Clark zooms to Detroit and gets there just in time to save Kara and Lois from the Bad Guy du Jour (standard Possessive Psycho Suitor 3A).

Then it's time for the wrap up. Papa Luthor tells Lex he loves him. Lex is unmoved. (Not that I can blame him. I've been jerked around so many times by the characters on this show that I wouldn't believe anything any of them said, much less Papa Luthor.) Clark berates Chloe for using her power, because it left her dead for eighteen hours (15 hours longer than the last time she used it); not a good trend. Chloe tells him it's her decision to make and Clark agrees.

Damn right. Back off, farm boy. You're not the only one who can take risky action to save people.

Lex wants to help Kara get her memory back. Oh, did I not mention that Kara has AMNESIA. Boy, never seen THAT plot before. Of course, he has an ulterior motive. So what else is new?

In summary: This was some deep hurting. I just have to keep reminding myself: It's all about Chloe. Chloe is always fun to watch. That and thinking of how I'd write the story if it were up to me. Fanfic--it's my anti-psychotic.

Comments

[htbthomas.livejournal.com]

The plotholes were particularly dangerous this time out, weren't they? :O

[sinanju.livejournal.com]

Yes indeed. And so easily dealt with. Leave Lex in a Detroit hospital. It's not like Lionel can't afford to fly out. And Clark and Chloe would have no difficulty getting there--just make sure they discover that Lois & Kara were around.

Lazy, lazy writing.

Well....

[(Anonymous)]

What do you expect? I stopped watching that show in the first season. Why? Well, there was a lack of continuity with the comics, but mostly because there was a new Kryptonite something every week, and everything was unbelievable. Remember how hard it was for Bruce Wayne to have a tiny sliver of Kryptonite to give to Terry? And in Smallville, every single town resident gets showered with the stuff because of ONE meteor? WTF? -Bryan

Re: Well....

[sinanju.livejournal.com]

Two! There has been a second meteor shower. Yay!

Or not yay. But anyway. As for not sticking to canon--which comic book continuity? There are lots of inconsistencies in the comics too. Just tell yourself, "It's fanfic."

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Man, I started watching this show right before Ollie showed up, and have been watching ever since. But when I saw the previews for this ep, I was like, didn't they do this on Angel? Faith is way cooler than Clark. And from what you describe, it looks like the TV version of The Cell. ::eyerolly::

[sinanju.livejournal.com]

...yeah. Very occasionally they do something really cool. Mostly it's pretty awful. But I loves me some Chloe. Plus, there aren't that many options for superpowered tv shows so you have to adjust your standards.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I agree. I like how they play with the comic verse in the show. I think my favorite ep this season was the cheesy one in which the movie was being filmed, because of the cape imagery at the end. I was like, "A TASTE OF THINGS TO COME. BWEE."